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Hollywood Holiday
"Where have the actors run off to?"
"'Round the corner, sir. They've favored a splash in the lake under scattered sun. Further, the actors plan on catching ocean perch inside the crack of darkness, and fry their trophies tonight while discussing Spinoza, Chopra and Ben Affleck. Additionally. they will be discerning the effects of the book 'Pride and Prejudice' and the public trust by campfire."
"Ocean perch?! That's a freshwater pond they're in."
"Yes, I've made them aware of it, sir. But they find that fish floating on top of the water are much easier to catch..."
"Well, where's the sport in that type of hunting?"
"I dunno', sir? I believe they'll be thoroughly inebriated perhaps...as a counter-balance?"
"Inebriated and discussing Chopra? It makes sense..." Jeruiq Cavendish sighed. "Tell me Poodle Boy, have they any sort of female remedies planned?"
"Oh, no they do not, sir. They are actors, like I said, and need nothing; save for substance!"
"And Poodle Boy, how did you come to the knowledge of their literary needs this eve?"
"Well sir, they asked to borrow my book and have me read it to them." Poodle boy bid 'Adieu' and squandered off to sharpen a hickory stick inside the framing of the log cabin door.
I, Squire, after emptying my account entering the Sundance Movie Table Read by People Who were Paid to be there Because there was so much Money Floating Around from Idiots Like Me, was awarded a Second Place consolation prize of "An Afternoon of frolic and chess with Kevin Smith; famed 'Minimalist-Elitist and Earthy Arrogant-thian'! OH BOY!!"
The fact is, for a moment, Kevin was quite charming. I showed him copies of my latest denials as the wind picked up and blew like a Nor' Easty...or Nor' Clipper and scattered the papers in consecutive order like a trail of breadcrumbs leading to this spot (the one below---scroll down...Picture) Dizzy and exhausted from chasing my 'signature', my 'stamp' upon life, we settled down in a pile of leaves under this canopy of fractal imagery...with me (silly me) counting my un-blessings. There we were, just two grown up guys, laying down, top-of-head-to-top-of-head, just kids...just two guys searching, thinking, feeling.
"Good show Kev" I whispered under the whipping post wind.
"Why do you say that TB-man?" he asked.
"You had a chance to spoil the moment...that precious moment...and you remained quiet; good show!"
"Thanks." I could tell he was moved. We went on to argue about 'Half-full, Half-Empty' philosophical conundrums and waltzed right across evening's dance floor and down the staircase of a lovely dusk interlude. The last words I heard before picking butternut squash from Cadbury Trees was, "How many times did you watch Crimson Tide; idiot?" Kevin likes to hurt because he's been hurt. I smiled and in a deep sleep, stir-fried my squash (it isn't code)...with as much MSG as I could gather from the Yangtze River (Yes, the same one where the peasants actually moved the river-BY HAND-because, according to the Dynasty ruler, "They need to look more busy!" *******Note to Reader:Not a grammar typo and...it's in the Bible...look it up! It's on Craigslist somewhere too! And Matt Barrie said it so it has to be really important!!
"Good show Kev" I whispered under the whipping post wind.
"Why do you say that TB-man?" he asked.
"You had a chance to spoil the moment...that precious moment...and you remained quiet; good show!"
"Thanks." I could tell he was moved. We went on to argue about 'Half-full, Half-Empty' philosophical conundrums and waltzed right across evening's dance floor and down the staircase of a lovely dusk interlude. The last words I heard before picking butternut squash from Cadbury Trees was, "How many times did you watch Crimson Tide; idiot?" Kevin likes to hurt because he's been hurt. I smiled and in a deep sleep, stir-fried my squash (it isn't code)...with as much MSG as I could gather from the Yangtze River (Yes, the same one where the peasants actually moved the river-BY HAND-because, according to the Dynasty ruler, "They need to look more busy!" *******Note to Reader:Not a grammar typo and...it's in the Bible...look it up! It's on Craigslist somewhere too! And Matt Barrie said it so it has to be really important!!
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